The Grace in Grace

人际关系. Interpersonal Relationship.

Seems so easy for some, but rather difficult to others. Once I did a DISC test, I got a very high D and C; and you guess it right, very low I. Since young, I was never the one to start conversations, or be the passive one. When I'm older, I'm still the same. I would only talk when people talk to me. I will only get close to you, if you get close to me. If I don't want to talk to you, I won't bother to try. Interpersonal Relationship doesn't seem to matter much to me, until today.

It all started with students switching off my CPU, turning off the lights. Today, it moved on to shifting my bag, touching my stuff and cutting the tape used to sercure the wire. I wondered to myself, what had I done?

Then I got to know that some students don't want to talk to me cause they feel that I wouldn't care what they say. And you guess it, before that I didn't bother speaking to them as well.

Yes, most of the times I walked away when they ask me questions about the assignment I had just demonstrated. It irritates me that they didn't listen and wasn't paying attention. Most times I would reply in an irritated tone asking them to find out from their friends; I never bothered to explain or at least find out why they won't following. So, I guess that why some students think that I don't care about them.

I mean like, I was once a student at their age. What would I expect of my teachers when I asked questions? And knowing that students nowadays are getting more challenging then my time.

Today it hit me that my interpersonal relationship with others suck. I'm ashame to admit that I once said "I want to continue what I've learn on Logos II". The cold fact is that I didn't. I did for awhile and then I went back to the normal self.

Like in school now, how many teachers do I really know and have spoken to? When I walk around in school, I don't even regconise most of my students, I don't bother to know their names, I don't bother to make eye contact.

Even more shameful in Church. I didn't even start conversation with the new and younger ones. Ashame to be a senior, yet not setting example.

Well, now that I have finally realise; it's time to wake up. Let's start right now..

Let's start anew with my students, with the people I'm working with, with the people around me. Let's start anew with Church people, even with my own family people.

Give me one more chance to make it right.