Monday, February 19, 2007
Dear Lord
Dear Lord,
I haven been in touch with you for a long time. My "tomorrow" never comes, my prayers are short, my heart is full. It feels like I'm standing all alone on the high way, while the dark clouds gathered and I didn't bring my raincoat. I'm feeling cold.. and all alone even though I know I'm not.
I feel like crying but the tears ran away. I tried to cover, but couldn't cover fully. I could still see the ugly side of the world and worse of all; me.
Then, I tried to face the wall but my thoughts won't let me go.
I guess I need sometime alone, like what I used to do. I recalled the times I made trips to the airport on my own and spend hours sitting down. Now, the airport seems so noisy. I need to find my quite place once more.
God, did I tell you that I have been feeling vexed? I don't have to, because You already knew. I tried to come to you, pour it out to you; but it just doesn't seem right. Why? What had happened? I seem like all screwed up. Didn't finish my project, screwed the presentation, sucked at theory.. and what more? I'm so so so screwed to the end. I can't imagine I scored amount the best in class in secondary school and now... amount the last.
Just what happened? Where did my passion go? What happened to Dare2Dream, what happened to my zeal, what happen to Grace?
Oh God...
I'm speechless. There seem to be no one I can talk to. Si Yun went away, no one left. Don't feel like going out with the usuals anymore, don't feel like leading, don't feel like standing up straight. I need to run, run to... I don't know where.
I'M JUST SO NOT ME! HELPPP!!!!
I want to let it out... but.. I can't.
Someone.. talk to me. Angels?
I haven been in touch with you for a long time. My "tomorrow" never comes, my prayers are short, my heart is full. It feels like I'm standing all alone on the high way, while the dark clouds gathered and I didn't bring my raincoat. I'm feeling cold.. and all alone even though I know I'm not.
I feel like crying but the tears ran away. I tried to cover, but couldn't cover fully. I could still see the ugly side of the world and worse of all; me.
Then, I tried to face the wall but my thoughts won't let me go.
I guess I need sometime alone, like what I used to do. I recalled the times I made trips to the airport on my own and spend hours sitting down. Now, the airport seems so noisy. I need to find my quite place once more.
God, did I tell you that I have been feeling vexed? I don't have to, because You already knew. I tried to come to you, pour it out to you; but it just doesn't seem right. Why? What had happened? I seem like all screwed up. Didn't finish my project, screwed the presentation, sucked at theory.. and what more? I'm so so so screwed to the end. I can't imagine I scored amount the best in class in secondary school and now... amount the last.
Just what happened? Where did my passion go? What happened to Dare2Dream, what happened to my zeal, what happen to Grace?Oh God...
I'm speechless. There seem to be no one I can talk to. Si Yun went away, no one left. Don't feel like going out with the usuals anymore, don't feel like leading, don't feel like standing up straight. I need to run, run to... I don't know where.
I'M JUST SO NOT ME! HELPPP!!!!
I want to let it out... but.. I can't.
Someone.. talk to me. Angels?
Labels: Dear Lord
# . Grace Eleora Loo : 2/19/2007 06:32:00 PM
